From the press notes:

"Watch these hard up Saturday amateur football players to fuck for their new kit! Paul Shipley, manager of the Saturday league team Cocksfield United, was to make his team players join a sponsored fuck-n-wank-a-thon to raise funds to buy next season's strip. Shipley is in even more hot water today as the local Thai birds he had booked from the local red light area failed to turn up at the event. Desperate for cash, the lads put on what many locals are saying is their best show this year. Resident sports expert Mickey Bradford said these horny fuckers didn't waste anytime by banging their full balls into each others' hungry holes!"